Issue 246 of SOCIALIST REVIEW Published November 2000 Copyright © Socialist Review

One thing has been pretty clear ever since Pan Am 103 exploded over Lockerbie--the authorities have cared little about the dead or their relatives, and even less about finding out who was really responsible for planting the bomb.

It is almost 12 years since the bombing took the lives of 259 passengers and crew, and 11 Lockerbie residents. Today two Libyans, Abdelbasset Ali Ahmed and Ali Amin Khalifa Fhimah, are standing trial, accused of the bombing.

Until now the trial has been farcical, with the major prosecution witness, a Libyan 'double agent', being completely discredited. Distrusted by his own CIA handlers and with a dubious record of black market activities, his motives for giving evidence include the potential to earn huge amounts of 'reward money' and gain residence in the US. The defence team has destroyed his evidence, and interestingly he has tried to implicate Malta (yes, Malta) in the conspiracy to blow up the plane. The Maltese premier is apparently in the same Masonic ring as Colonel Gadaffi.

Now you may find Malta an unlikely source for such action but I say, why not? It's as good a country as any to blame, and blaming countries is what this whole process is all about. Interestingly the blame has shifted as US foreign policy needs have changed. Originally Iran was held up as the country most likely to blame, then Syria, then Palestinians working alone, and then finally Gadaffi was to be the bogeyman. The fact that a Libyan spiv has thrown Malta into the ring shouldn't surprise us.

'Stack on the Back' can now exclusively reveal that western intelligence sources are bracing themselves should the case collapse, and they are casting their scientific sticking pin further afield. Frankly, I am delighted. I always felt that sticking pins into maps of the Middle East and shouting, 'Yep, he's the one. No doubt about it, it's Syria, or Iran, Iraq, Libya,' was hardly fair. Look, I have no problem with the method. After all, US intelligence agencies are just like their British counterparts--a contradiction in terms. So damn it, let them stick pins in maps if that's all they can do. But, in the interests of fairness, do not restrict the exercise to the Middle East.

I can reveal that this casting of the net is already producing some startling theories, which have come about due to unprecedented cooperation between the FBI, CIA, MI5, MI6 and the TSB. A dramatic document that has fallen into my hands shows that there is now a clear and methodical approach being taken when lining up suspects.

'First of all', say the authors, 'the suspect should be someone, or some country, that we don't like. Secondly, a leader or country that can be easily demonised. Thirdly, if their guilt gives a reason for gaining a strategic foothold in the region, all the better.' They then go on to list the main suspects:

1. SLOBODAN MILOSEVIC: Now that he has fallen from power, surely we can investigate him. A thoroughly bad egg who has been single-handedly responsible for all the ills of the Balkans. He could easily have done it. He didn't like the west, and we didn't like him. OK, we hadn't decided that back at the time of the investigation but we have now, so we could add it to his list of war crimes. And just in case he's guilty let's bomb the hell out of Belgrade. The people there loved us for it last time, so why not do it again.
   Of course, Slobba's gone now, and we've got loads of stuff against him, so maybe we should look elsewhere and catch another enemy of freedom, justice and the American way.
2. ROBERT MUGABE: Yes, that's it, the old land grabber. After all, how did he get to power? Terrorism! What is he doing to white settlers? Terrorising them! It's in his blood. He loves it. Of course we were doing fine with Mugabe at the time of the bombing, but we now know he was just biding his time.
   Also, the great advantage to this theory is that we could begin to sabre rattle, and move forces into the region with justification. South Africa would be even better, but we'd never sell Mandela as our man as there's too many pop songs about him and the chief's had too many photos taken with him. He'd never buy it.
   Just in case we reach agreement with him, we could look a little nearer the heart of the beast.
3. COLOMBIAN DRUG BARONS: Well, they're used to smuggling, and who knows what ideas they come up with while hallucinating on that cocaine and marijuana.
   Let's invade them. You never know what we'll discover. There's bound to be one baron who, given a huge amount of money and his freedom, would stitch the rest up. Zero tolerance--it's the only thing these people understand.
   
4. FIDEL CASTRO: He's Cuban, he's Commie, and it would go down well with our old Bay of Pigs friends in Florida and atone for that Elian mess.
   'Stack on the Back' is pleased to report that the investigation is even more thorough this time than the last. This can be demonstrated by showing the other names that were to be investigated but ruled out. The document provides a glossary of those ruled out and the reasons why.
   
5. CHINA: Too big.
6. RUSSIA: Ditto.
7. ISRAEL: Too peace loving.
8. AUSTRIA: Too right wing to harm the US.
9. LEON TROTSKY: Too dead.
10. ANN WIDDECOMBE: Mad enough, but would have blown herself up in the process.
11. GERRY ADAMS: As with Mandela, too many pictures with the chief.

Thought unlikely but not ruled out:

1. JOHN LENNON
2. VIDEO NASTIES
3. JULIUS and ETHEL ROSENBERG

So there you have it. It's good to see that at last they're taking the investigation seriously, isn't it?